Entry tags:
god, not again.
Dear Child's Teacher:
The kid has a WART. It is not a weeping chancre. It is not EBOLA. It is not a LIMB ABOUT TO DROP THE FUCK OFF IN YOUR LUNCH. It is a WART. And what's more, it's a goddamn DEAD WART. Because you freaked the goddamn hell out and so we had to drag the child to the doctor and practically sit on him so we could ATTACK HIM WITH LIQUID NITROGEN so he wouldn't have OMGWTFBBQ WART. I should have made YOU do it. Considering YOU were the one with the PROBLEM.
Also! The sore on the kid's lip is a COLD SORE. It is FINE. I have had them ALL MY LIFE. AGAIN. NOT WEEPING CHANCRE. NOT EBOLA. NOT LEAPING NIGERIAN CROTCH ROT. OKAY? A COLD SORE. DEAL. If you even THINK about making me keep this child home whenever those pop up I will HAUNT YOUR ASS, because I will PROBABLY BE DEAD FROM CRAZY.
In other words! STOP EMAILING ME IN A PANIC, YOU TWIT.
And if I hear ONE THING about you being A MEDICALLY FRAGILE SITE I will come down there and INTRODUCE MY CRUTCHES TO YOUR APPENDIX. PERSONALLY. I think your school nurse is on CRACK and so are YOU. You have already sent home the child when he was NOT SICK one too many times, and I am LOSING PATIENCE. ONE THING. GO ON. FEEL FREE TO TEMPT ME IF YOU LIKE.
The kid has a WART. It is not a weeping chancre. It is not EBOLA. It is not a LIMB ABOUT TO DROP THE FUCK OFF IN YOUR LUNCH. It is a WART. And what's more, it's a goddamn DEAD WART. Because you freaked the goddamn hell out and so we had to drag the child to the doctor and practically sit on him so we could ATTACK HIM WITH LIQUID NITROGEN so he wouldn't have OMGWTFBBQ WART. I should have made YOU do it. Considering YOU were the one with the PROBLEM.
Also! The sore on the kid's lip is a COLD SORE. It is FINE. I have had them ALL MY LIFE. AGAIN. NOT WEEPING CHANCRE. NOT EBOLA. NOT LEAPING NIGERIAN CROTCH ROT. OKAY? A COLD SORE. DEAL. If you even THINK about making me keep this child home whenever those pop up I will HAUNT YOUR ASS, because I will PROBABLY BE DEAD FROM CRAZY.
In other words! STOP EMAILING ME IN A PANIC, YOU TWIT.
And if I hear ONE THING about you being A MEDICALLY FRAGILE SITE I will come down there and INTRODUCE MY CRUTCHES TO YOUR APPENDIX. PERSONALLY. I think your school nurse is on CRACK and so are YOU. You have already sent home the child when he was NOT SICK one too many times, and I am LOSING PATIENCE. ONE THING. GO ON. FEEL FREE TO TEMPT ME IF YOU LIKE.
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