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because I was tagged by everyone, their goldfish AND their pet hamster, 25 things about phin
1. I spent seven years as a vegetarian. It started as a reaction to a badly done cut of meat (i don't remember what type it was now) and ended because of bacon. I still don't eat a lot of meat, and I like to buy local when I can. As far as bacon, I'm terribly spoiled by our local butcher's bacon and frequently refuse to buy anything else. (The backup bacon pusher is a local german deli who has double-smoked bacon.)
2. I hate the fact that I'm not currently working more than anything, because I really do believe in Linda Hirschman's philosophy that women have a responsibility to keep their work history and skills current. I keep applying for jobs but so far nothing's bothered to even call me. This leads to more self-loathing than I can adequately describe.
3. I love to write; I've always wanted to write. But I keep wrestling with the feeling that I need another, more "responsible" job. This leads to even more self-loathing. I really don't like myself very much. I try to hide it as much as I can, but it's really difficult.
4. My legs are spastic - stiff and difficult to move - and my arms and fingers are hypermobile.
5. My first major in college was film. I adore film history and I'm really excellent at writing about it. I wanted to do screenwriting because it was the closest I could get to writing. Again with the 'responsible' job. I would love to review films but - yeah, that again with the not-calling me back/not-finding a job doing it to even apply for.
6. I used to want three children. That changed after Sean was born pretty quickly.
7. I've had serious anxiety problems as far back as third grade, possibly further back. I've only been able to adequately treat most of them in the past six months. This led to a lot of missed chances. (again with the self-loathing thing).
8. I'm a really great ideas person but I'm not as good with the follow-through.
9. I have always been a cat person, although I frequently want to borrow someone's dog for a few hours.
10. As far as religion I self-identify as Hindu/Buddhist although I have a strange fascination with the Catholic church.
11. I've only had sex with two people.
12. My mother took me to a casino the night of my 19th birthday (19 is the legal age for gambling in Ontario). I won about a hundred and fifty dollars on roulette that night. I haven't been in a casino since.
13. When I was a teenager I spent two or three hours every night or every other night with my best high school friend. Now I despise the phone except for very rare occasions.
14. I couldn't walk unassisted until I was nearly six.
15. My favorite movie is Good Bye, Lenin! It's about a woman who was in a coma during the reunification of Germany. When she wakes up from her coma, her family has to hide the fact that East Germany no longer exists because the shock would kill her.
16. I used to know all the words to a sung latin mass. I've been in a choral group several times in my life. I sometimes think I might like to get back into singing, especially in something like the seattle medieval women's choir but I always feel like I don't have enough time. (Not feeling like I have enough time for things is a constant problem, even though I spend more than enough time doing not much more than refreshing my LJ/twitter. it comes from feeling I should be always here otherwise I'm not a real writer. My issues, let me show you them.)
17. I have synesthesia. Mine is based around smells and colors. This is part of why I love BPAL perfumes so much.
18. I used to walk on my toes because I couldn't put my feet flat. I had tendon release surgery when I was eight years old and now I can walk normally. This means I've learned to walk twice in my lifetime.
19. Most of the time I really hate cooked eggs.
20. When I was in casts for twelve weeks after the tendon release surgery (six weeks with a bar between my ankles; six weeks without the bar) I wrote the word 'telemarketing' on my right thigh in purple marker because I thought the word sounded interesting. I didn't know what it meant for several years after that.
21. When I was ten years old my family moved while I was away at summer camp. They didn't tell me until after the fact. After that I stopped trusting them, for fairly obvious reasons.
22. Last year around this time (specifically the day after Valentine's Day) I went to the ER with severe aphasia, which had been coming on for several days before the fact. I didn't realize it at the time because it was only verbal aphasia and I didn't really speak to anyone most of the time during the day. It was a side effect of several drugs I was on at the time. They thought I might have had a stroke. At least one of the doctors was amazingly condescending at the time. One of the nurses tried to keep Chris out of the area where they took information and checked vitals despite the fact that I couldn't speak up for myself (this stopped because Chris forced the issue immediately). Also the person at the front desk couldn't spell 'aphasia'. At the time, and also now, I thought this was extremely ironic.
23. I picked out my own engagement ring.
24. The first movie I saw in theaters was 'Bambi'. The second movie I ever saw in theaters was 'Snow White and the Seven Dwarves.' To this day I'm still freaked out by the evil stepmother in that movie (a fact that my ex-bf and his mother made fun of me for)
25. My most severe phobia is fear of falling/heights. This is bad enough that I can't walk near the glass barricades at malls, and I freak out if my friends/family do so; it also extends to bridges. It's so bad that I'm actually shaking writing about this.
2. I hate the fact that I'm not currently working more than anything, because I really do believe in Linda Hirschman's philosophy that women have a responsibility to keep their work history and skills current. I keep applying for jobs but so far nothing's bothered to even call me. This leads to more self-loathing than I can adequately describe.
3. I love to write; I've always wanted to write. But I keep wrestling with the feeling that I need another, more "responsible" job. This leads to even more self-loathing. I really don't like myself very much. I try to hide it as much as I can, but it's really difficult.
4. My legs are spastic - stiff and difficult to move - and my arms and fingers are hypermobile.
5. My first major in college was film. I adore film history and I'm really excellent at writing about it. I wanted to do screenwriting because it was the closest I could get to writing. Again with the 'responsible' job. I would love to review films but - yeah, that again with the not-calling me back/not-finding a job doing it to even apply for.
6. I used to want three children. That changed after Sean was born pretty quickly.
7. I've had serious anxiety problems as far back as third grade, possibly further back. I've only been able to adequately treat most of them in the past six months. This led to a lot of missed chances. (again with the self-loathing thing).
8. I'm a really great ideas person but I'm not as good with the follow-through.
9. I have always been a cat person, although I frequently want to borrow someone's dog for a few hours.
10. As far as religion I self-identify as Hindu/Buddhist although I have a strange fascination with the Catholic church.
11. I've only had sex with two people.
12. My mother took me to a casino the night of my 19th birthday (19 is the legal age for gambling in Ontario). I won about a hundred and fifty dollars on roulette that night. I haven't been in a casino since.
13. When I was a teenager I spent two or three hours every night or every other night with my best high school friend. Now I despise the phone except for very rare occasions.
14. I couldn't walk unassisted until I was nearly six.
15. My favorite movie is Good Bye, Lenin! It's about a woman who was in a coma during the reunification of Germany. When she wakes up from her coma, her family has to hide the fact that East Germany no longer exists because the shock would kill her.
16. I used to know all the words to a sung latin mass. I've been in a choral group several times in my life. I sometimes think I might like to get back into singing, especially in something like the seattle medieval women's choir but I always feel like I don't have enough time. (Not feeling like I have enough time for things is a constant problem, even though I spend more than enough time doing not much more than refreshing my LJ/twitter. it comes from feeling I should be always here otherwise I'm not a real writer. My issues, let me show you them.)
17. I have synesthesia. Mine is based around smells and colors. This is part of why I love BPAL perfumes so much.
18. I used to walk on my toes because I couldn't put my feet flat. I had tendon release surgery when I was eight years old and now I can walk normally. This means I've learned to walk twice in my lifetime.
19. Most of the time I really hate cooked eggs.
20. When I was in casts for twelve weeks after the tendon release surgery (six weeks with a bar between my ankles; six weeks without the bar) I wrote the word 'telemarketing' on my right thigh in purple marker because I thought the word sounded interesting. I didn't know what it meant for several years after that.
21. When I was ten years old my family moved while I was away at summer camp. They didn't tell me until after the fact. After that I stopped trusting them, for fairly obvious reasons.
22. Last year around this time (specifically the day after Valentine's Day) I went to the ER with severe aphasia, which had been coming on for several days before the fact. I didn't realize it at the time because it was only verbal aphasia and I didn't really speak to anyone most of the time during the day. It was a side effect of several drugs I was on at the time. They thought I might have had a stroke. At least one of the doctors was amazingly condescending at the time. One of the nurses tried to keep Chris out of the area where they took information and checked vitals despite the fact that I couldn't speak up for myself (this stopped because Chris forced the issue immediately). Also the person at the front desk couldn't spell 'aphasia'. At the time, and also now, I thought this was extremely ironic.
23. I picked out my own engagement ring.
24. The first movie I saw in theaters was 'Bambi'. The second movie I ever saw in theaters was 'Snow White and the Seven Dwarves.' To this day I'm still freaked out by the evil stepmother in that movie (a fact that my ex-bf and his mother made fun of me for)
25. My most severe phobia is fear of falling/heights. This is bad enough that I can't walk near the glass barricades at malls, and I freak out if my friends/family do so; it also extends to bridges. It's so bad that I'm actually shaking writing about this.
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13. When I was a teenager I spent two or three hours every night or every other night with my best high school friend. Now I despise the phone except for very rare occasions.
SAME. I was always on the phone as a teenager. Now, I hate talking on the phone. HATE it.
And shit, wtf with your family moving while you were at summer camp??
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